THE "ANIMAL" AT MY DINING TABLE

The "Animal" at my dinning table

It was a calm evening - the elements of weather were in their best moods - a cool breeze was blowing gently, occassionaly shifting the curtains in my dinning room. While bending the whistling pine trees close to my house; making them to produce some rythmic sounds.

The day was like any other day; with the usual hectic schedule that has become a norm in my daily activities. And i was hoping to retire to bed early after eating a meal i vowed to prepare by myself without patronising a restaurant or fast food (after all what a woman can do - a man can do better too). Though several efforts in the past has failed, but like Abraham Lincoln failure in

anything doesn't stop me from trying again and again until i succeed. So my buying of a cookery book recently was (as i thought) an 'anecdote' to the challenges i face in my kitchen. 

But unfortunately for me, i was midway into the cooking of the delicacy which i was reading directly from the cookery book, the book caught fire as i mistakenly placed it close to the gas burner!

With the cookery guide book burnt, i had no other choice but to 'finish' the cooking - after all i am a Nigerian and every Nigerian is ingenuous .  As i 'summarily executed' the food items, i quickly dished out some of the food into a glass plate and moved to the sitting room which has a small demarcation for the dinning table and i was shocked at the sight i beheld! - An Animal, calmly waiting at the dinning table waiting to be served!

Though any normal person would have reacted by screaming, but not me. I summoned courage and walked close to the dinning table and said: "What's the meaning of this?  "who invited you to dinner?Get out!!"I uttered raising the metal object that came handy. But the Animal remained there, unshaken. Just as my mind began racing like the seconds - hands of a clock - as i remembered the stories of witches and wizards. So i began speaking in tongues, binding and casting. It was only then the animal opened it mouth revealing a set of brown - dracula like teeth and uttered: "Just like the average Nigerian - very religious" and i fainted!

On coming up minutes later, i was further shocked to see that the food i have left in the kitchen has been served on my dinning table with  water and every other thing in place. Summoning  the courage of unknown magnitude, i stood up and asked: "What are you? and why are you here?" " Easy brother," the animal replied in a monotone voice. "I am a friend of man as you know too well, so i wont  harm to you, with all due respect sir". said the Animal. As i opened my mouth to talk, nothing came out as i seem to have lost my voice, just as the animal cut in: "Sir, i've been observing you from a distance, just like i do on other humans - you can as well call it stalking, and i've come to believe that your one of the best of humanity". 

I was further dumbfounded by this flattering remark by a mere 'Animal' but i immediately countered: "But you're a mere 'animal, animals don't talk. Unless your something else.." i said concerned; "Yes. i admit that i am a mere animal - yet i am better than some of your fellow humans!".  The animal stated with an air of conviction. It took some minutes before the import of that statement was assimilated by me.

"You're dreaming. You cant reverse nature. The creator has already made humans to be higher and better than you and all other animals". I retorted. Just as a the animal's face lit up in a contemptuous grin. " Sir, with all due respect, listen to the following facts: Have you seen a lion killing a lion before? no matter how savagely or hungry looking the lion might be? Of course the answer is no, lions do not kill lions despite being a 'beast' but compare it with what have been happening in some parts of your country  in recent years and fill in the void yourself...  or do i talk about the happenings in Iraq, Syria, Libya, Somalia, Afghanistan among others. Sir, some humans are not better than me an animal - so i'm qualified to eat this meal you prepared - though i dont know how delicious it'll be considering the fact that your cookery book got burnt before you finished". The animal stated and adjusted a little on the seat for fear i might take offence at the last comments.

"You are still dreaming. if you think you'll dine on the same table with me cos of some misconceptions you barbor about humanity then better go to my backyard and hang yourself on one of the trees. who are you to judge humanity? After all did you not hear that to err is human and to forgive is divine..." "Yes, sir with all due respect and sorry for cutting you shut. I know that humanity was designed to fail cos of error, error and error again and they have failed. That is why we in the animal world view most humans as being equal to us based on their actions and inactions. To further buttress this - have you seen the video clips of several killings by Boko Haram and ISIS?  As well as the fighting in Ukraine? 

Sir, that can never happen in our jungle - no leopard will kill a fellow leopard that way, no monkey will do same, but the killings by Islamic terrorist shows how beastly humanity has descended to. 

Another one sir, recently, i closed my online accounts and discarded my ATM cards due to dubious characters and thieves who prowl through the internet seeking for whom to devour. The animal uttered amidst a stammer.

 "Enough of this trash you animal!" As i rushed to the bedroom to get a killer weapon, the ANIMAL disappeared - though he wasn't really a wild Animal, but he was an Animal called Man!

(NB. The recent events in around the world calls for sober reflection by every person on planet earth. Humanity has missed it - And it is pertinent to state that we did not negotiate with the creator during our procreation. As you go to bed every nite just ask God to make you a blessing to your fellow humans. More so look for someone today and make a smile cross that person's face by ur act, no matter how simple).